Marriage

Had I gone to Mass this morning, I would have heard a Gospel about marriage and perhaps a homily about marriage, like this one.  Frankly, given the homilies I've heard in the last 3 years I doubt it but miracles never cease.

Last night, I watched "How to Make an American Quilt"  In this movie, marriage takes a beating.  Couples are unfaithful; marriages are only happening because of unplanned pregnancies and of course there is snarky dialogue about how unnatural marriage is.

It's interesting that the subject of marriage is on my mind.  My aunt has suggested to me that the solution to my unemployment problem is to marry a rich man.  There have been some interesting marital dynamics I've observed recently.

I've pretty much lost all hope that I'll ever get married.  Not sure how to go out and meet men which is the primary problem.

But I'm also realizing the pool of potential partners is rapidly shrinking.

I'm not sure why I'm thinking about this.  I never wanted to get married when I was younger.  I thought men were unnecessary.  However, after going to a swamp in the middle of the night and clammering around on rocky trails I've realized guys are pretty handy to have around.  They are certainly less catty.

I don't know.  I keep thinking of the line for the Dawes song...I just want someone to make the days move easy.

Sunday Ritual

For the last 3 years, I've gotten up early on Sunday and driven somewhere for Mass.  In the evening, I would write up my experience at Mass and post some pictures.

I finished last week.  I also decided to stop going to Mass.

Today was the first Sunday I didn't go to Mass in 3 years.

It's been very odd.  I'm at a loss of what to do with myself.

The ritual is over and I need a new one to take its place.

I just want someone to make the days move easy

Wearing PJs all day

I've pretty much worn pjs everyday since being laid off unless Adventure Buddy needs to be coaxed out of his cave and into the sunshine or fog or night or whatever.

I'm all mopey and depressed and have been sleeping later and later every day.  I'm also forgetting to shower.... :P

Then I had AN IDEA!

I'll get up!  I'll clean up!  I'll get dressed!  NO! I'll wear a DRESS!!!!  I'll "fix" my hair!  I'll wear nicish shoes!  I'll drag Adventure Buddy along!

We'll go to swankiest snobbiest bar in the are and sip martinis!  YES!  I'll feel better.

It was going so well.  Adventure Buddy and I went to lunch.  We went to Divine Liturgy!  (Side note:  dressing well paid off since I managed to attract attention to myself...)  Except neither Adventure Buddy or I got lots of sleep the night before.

Adventure Buddy wanted to nap.  I let him.  While he was napping I tried to nap.  Except I couldn't.

Because I wasn't distracted enough, I started thinking.  and then I started crying.

Eventually we went out for martinis but I was so upset and stressed and trying not to cry that I was just not myself.

Is big dork.

Yeah.  Best laid plans of mice and men and all that.

Job Interview

I had a job interview.

It went really well.  Then I was asked to balance a chemical equation.

Yeah.

Did I mention I have a physics and an education degree?

Yeah.

What I did on Friday Night

See the pictures!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/46157142@N05/sets/72157631553581297/

Road Trips and Lonliness

Had I not lost my job, I'd be somewhere in Oregon right now.  I'd be taking pictures of waterfalls and lighthouses.

Sadly, I lost my job and am not in Oregon or anywhere near Oregon.

Yesterday I went on a mini-road trip of sorts.  I tried to entice Adventure Buddy to go along but he did not want to go.  So I went alone.

It was alright.  As I was driving, I reflected on why I was so meh about the whole thing.

I was alone.  There was no one to talk with in the car.  There was no one to talk with at the different places.  No one to share my experiences with.  No one to get lost with.

Why bother going anywhere?