More on Doomed to Fail

I was listening to the radio this morning on the way to work and Mumford & Sons' Roll Away Your Stone was playing.  I think my thoughts can be summed up in these lines:

It's not the long walk home that will change this heart,

But the welcome I receive at the restart.

Doomed to Fail

The St. Louis Archdiocese has undertaken an initiative called "Catholics Come Home."  You can find out more about it at the Archdiocese's Website or at Catholics Come Home.

Here's one of the videos which has been airing in St. Louis.  

I can't help thinking that this effort is doomed to fail.  I don't think it is doctrine or beliefs that is why it is doomed to fail.  Yes, there are people that have left the Church over issues of doctrine or misunderstandings of said doctrine.  But again, it is not doctrine that keeps people out or keeps them from staying.

I have been visiting various churches in the St. Louis Archdiocese since August 2009.  I have to say, we are not a friendly bunch of people.  It is better in the rural parishes as the populations are smaller and everyone tends to know everyone else.  They know I don't belong and are for the most part, friendly and curious as to why I'm at their Church (I'm a spy!)  In the larger parishes, I'm often not acknowledged at all.  In some cases, no one shakes hands with me during the Sign of Peace.  I never mention this on the blog, because I feel it isn't fair and rather subjective.  

My social circle is rather small and often times I don't talk to anyone all day if I don't go to work.  It is a major bummer when I'm not even acknowledged at Mass.  I'm not talking ooo she's new have her stand up and introduce herself after Communion, I'm talking about something much more basic, a simple head nod, a smile maybe a hello.

It's not the behavior of people at Mass that bothers me (well...) either.  Coming late, leaving early, talking through the Mass (ok I guilty of that) and generally checking out.  It does show how not serious we take our Faith.

It's not a joyful place for the most part either.  Many times people don't look happy to be at Mass.  I'd even settle for contentment.  Some people even look grumpy.  I'm sure it's not Mass that's making them grumpy but what's going on outside their lives but...

I have been contemplating where to register as a parishoner which has led to deeper questions about whether or not I want to continue practicing Catholicism.  I think back about my experiences and am like it's not really feeding me. Now I realize that it is my fault.  I'm not a good Catholic and I don't do much to mature and grow in my Faith.  But I was thinking about the homily I heard today and how others help to lead us to Faith.  Not a lot of leading.  Unless I'm supposed to be leading and in that case we are in serious trouble. 

Now I realize that my better Catholic friends will decry my appeal to emotion and the feel good Jesus cult.  The Catholic Church is the Truth after all.  And that should suffice.

But it doesn't.  At least for me.  I'm not there in my personal relationship with God/Jesus and so I need the feel goodness to get me there or at least on the right path thinking about it.

So what has this got to do with the Catholics Come Home failing?  When I lived in Iowa, I lived across the street from the couple that ran Campus Crusade for Christ.  They were always kind to me and they were always joyful.  And they were constantly inviting me to join their Campus Crusade.  I remember registering at the Catholic parish but I don't think anyone ever invited me to anything. (this was in the days before facebook and all that jazz).

I'm beginning to think that a personal relationship with Jesus would be helped by a personal relationship with some of His followers.  We all row together and all that rot.  Jesus did not call just 1 disciple, He called 12.  They were like a team.  When they went off preaching, they didn't go alone, they went with someone else.  

I just can't help think that it's going to fail because people can't establish connections with real people.  Mostly I'm thinking of my experiences and how if I wasn't Catholic, I'm not so sure I'd want to be. 

I'm still incredibly irritated by the lady in the pew next to me at Mass who informed me that using my iPad during Mass was inappropriate.  She told me during the First Reading (during Mass).  I could have been following along with my Missal App.  She had no idea what I was doing but felt she could call me out on my behavior.  Yes I was probably wrong to snark back that being late to Mass was also inappropriate.  But I can't help thinking, what if I was not Catholic.  Maybe I would have been looking at how Mass works so I knew what to do.  And instead of asking me if I was new or what have you she assumed I was being bad.  Last week I went to a Mass in Korean and one nice lady could tell I couldn't follow along and she sat next to me with her Missal and pointed out where we were through out the whole Mass.  At the two Christmas Masses I went to, there were lots of C&E (Christmas and Easter) and CAPE (Christmas, Ash Wednesday, Palm Sunday and Easter) Catholics.  I could tell because the responses we use at Mass had just changed and they were confused.  No one announced this to them.  I left the Catholic Church for 10 years.  I remembered all the responses so I wouldn't have used the missal regardless.  No one said anything at the beginning of these Masses.  

We need to do something to bring back Catholics.  I will be the first to admit that I don't do anything to reach out or encourage all the non-practicing Catholics.  Perhaps the first step is to be friendly and to acknowledge them.  And then ask them.

Guess where I work?

CoWorker:  I left Jupiter somewhere!  I can't find Jupiter!

I've just helped a coworker find a small sphere Earth that is the same size as her Jupiter.

What To Read?

Now that I can read things other than esoteric journal articles or books about my dissertation topic (or how to write a dissertation), I'm having a hard time finding something to read.  I want something light and airy.  Scratch that.  I want literary junk food!

Library Girl posted a link discussing books similar to Downton Abbey.  I'm rather excited but I'm worried it will Austin-esque and I just can't go there.

So many books I can't choose!

I beg of you...

please stop asking me what I want to do with Ph.D. now that I have it.  Stop asking me what I want to do with my life.  I haven't a clue.  In fact, this Savage Chickens cartoon sums it up brilliantly:

I haven't the foggiest :)

First Knitting Lesson

I took my first knitting class tonight!  I learned how to cast on and how to knit.  Pretty snazzy.  I'm to practice that and when I get it down I go back and learn how to purl and to bind off. 

What should my first project be?

I don't want to seem catty

so a conversation with a friend started.

Let me give you a hint.  Any conversation that start with the phrases like:
I don't mean to be insulting
I don't want to seem rude, catty, critical,

usually are.